The Guys That Participate in No Shave November

November 5, 2013

Although I can’t say I’m too keen on the pedophile mustaches many of you will flaunt this month, I can admit that facial hair is sexy. “Movember”, or “No Shave November” officially began in 2004 as a way to gather awareness for prostate cancer. To many of us women, Movember is just an excuse for men to dismiss the general rules of hygiene in favor of a masculine competition. What nobody can deny is that “No Shave November” it is one event that truly unifies men across the world.

There a few types of men that participate in No Shave November.

“Lots of Hair, Don’t Care”- This is the guy who is completely against excessive grooming. If there were to be an entire year devoted to not shaving, he’d accept the challenge in a heart beat. Its possible that he might not even realize it is no-shave-november until halfway through the month but conveniently hadn’t shaved since mid-October. “Nothing is sexier than a lumberjack.”


Russell Brand owns neither a razor or a hairbrush!
Russell Brand owns neither a razor or a hairbrush!
Billy Bones believes that every day should be celebrated like No Shave November!
Suffolk University student Billy Bones can grow a beard faster than a chia pet!

The Ring Leader- The ring leader is the guy with the intense personality who loves any excuse to make an extreme physical change. It is likely he loved a good hair-bleach or mohawk for a championship game back in high school (even if he wasn’t on the actual team) and a playoff beard for the World Series this year.  Thus, no-shave-november is their element. This guy will pressure his peers into participating in the event, and harasses them if they so much as trim their neck hair. Somebody has to lead the pack.

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Mikey started to grow his gnarly facial hair out for the Red Sox, and isn’t quitting just yet.

The Follower- This guy is persuaded by his bros in participating in Movember every year. He hates it because of his lack of impressive facial hair, but likes the group involvement. The follower doesn’t have this “sexy scruff” girls talk about, but instead awkwardly placed hairs all over his face.

J Beibs is sad that he cannot grow a mustache.
J Beibs is sad that he cannot grow a mustache. But he will still try.

The Non-Conformist- The “well kept” dude with jeans tighter than your average female who participates rarely goes all out but instead flaunts a mustache that would encourage most mothers to hide their children. This bro loves looking retro and what better accessory than a creeper-stache.

James Franco, so sexy that not even a 70's dad mustache could make him less attractive.
James Franco, so sexy that not even a 70’s dad mustache could make him less attractive.
*PBR in hand*
*PBR in hand* Hipsters love the mustache

The Philanthropist- No matter how horrific this bros facial hair may be, he will not shave. Why? Because he is participating in No Shave November for the cause. He may have people sponsoring his mustache/beard or he may just truly be trying to raise awareness. Regardless, even if his beard doesn’t grow quite as flawlessly as others, his devotion is attractive.

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Zack, king of the facial hair.

If you look like Jesus or Mel Gibson with facial hair, anticipate a decrease in the action you get this month. If you are actually raising money for prostate cancer awareness, MAKE IT KNOWN!

Get your mustache/facial hair SPONSORED. Do it for the cause boys!!

I’ll tolerate the rug burn

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Are you looking for spare change… or? 

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More about Mackenzie

Retired scene queen living in Astoria, New York with my boyfriend Ben. Accidentally started blogging in 2011, haven't stopped since. Lover of Nutella, hater of white jeans after labor day. Graduate of Suffolk University with a degree in Sociology. During the day I work for Petrossian Caviar, the world's largest caviar supplier and buyer. I have a wonderful life, and I'm excited to share it with you. Also, I have seen every episode of Law & Order: SVU.

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