Guys– This is why you're NOT hot.

April 11, 2014

Guys, ever wonder why girls don’t seem particularly impressed by your “swag”? Some things are obvious. For one, no girl wants anything to do with your Aeropostale graphic t-shirts, or running shoes worn with light-washed jeans. However, while many girls have different “types”, it seems like we can all agree on certain things that are ALWAYS a turnoff.

 

(My top 5)

1.) When a guy doesn’t like dogs.

2.) Guys that wear tanks that reveal their nipples at the gym.

"I CANT"
“I CANT”

3.) Guys that own t-shirts that say things like “Cool story babe make me a sandwich” “party with sluts” “all I do is fuck and party”  “Win or loose we still booze” etc.

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4.) Colored wayfarer sunglasses: a clear sign a guy only listens to EDM

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5.) Light-wash jeans. I literally bought an ex boyfriend a new pair of dark wash jeans because I hated his light-wash ones THAT much. If you’re doing yard work I guess it doesn’t bother me that much… but a pair of light-wash Levi jeans paired with some Timberland boots are a huge turn-off for me.

(What everyone else had to say )

6.) “White watches and white sunglasses” – Taylor  (University of South Carolina) Screen Shot 2014-04-11 at 9.45.57 PM

7.) “Unibrow, like pluck that shit I don’t care if you’re a boy unibrows are unacceptable”- Kate (Coastal Carolina)

8.) “Adidas Sneakers,light washed jeans, baggy cargo shorts, plain chain necklaces, gross teeth, and zits that need to be popped”  Amanda (Suffolk University)

9.) “Agreed with the adidas thing! A guy can be hot but then if I look down and he’s wearing Adidas or new balances or something along those lines he automatically becomes about 10x less hotter to me……idk weird but it’s true” -Kathryn (Suffolk University)

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10.) “If he wears Hollister or Abercrombie and takes selfies”- Kathryn (UMASS Amherst)

11.) “Definitely selfies, HATE that, especially mirror pic selfies”- Rachel (Salem State)

*why* did you have to take this picture????
*why* did you have to take this picture????

12.) “I hate guys who wear polos. I don’t know why. I just think after middle school they should be burned.”- Danica (New York City)

13.) “Polo Shirts” – Alyssa (Bloomsburg University)

*polo shirts are acceptable when playing golf*
Truthfully I don’t mind polo shirts but for some reason I don’t like “Izod” or anything like that.

14.) “Basketball shorts and sweatpants like please bitch it only takes you 20 minutes to get ready at least throw on something decent” Amy (Suffolk University)

15.) “I’m gunna have to disagree with Amy. I think its hot when guys wear basketball shorts and sweats and look hot effortlessly” – Jane (Suffolk University)

16.) “Bad jeans (too short, light wash, flare, that other really weird blue color that some guys wear.) Also, I know you don’t have to wash your jeans everyday but some guys think it’s like actually fine to never change their pants once they find a pair they like, as if we like weirdly don’t notice” – Siobhan (Suffolk University)

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17.) “Boogie boarding, hemp chokers, tribal tattoos (when they clearly aren’t in a tribe)” – Madison (University of California – Santa Barbara)

18.) “When guys call you ‘bro’ or ‘dude'” – Madeline (Westfield State)

19.) “Jean Jackets” -Brooke  (West Chester University of Pennsylvania)

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20.) “Wearing snap back hats straight forward…..ugh”- Kim (Bridgewater State)

21.) “Khaki shorts that have like 3000 pockets …WHAT DO U NEED THOSE FOR.” -Dzenita (Suffolk University)

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22.) “Jean shorts…. like absolutely not”- Sarah (Suffolk University)

23.) “Coffee breath freaks me the f out // gross tongues”- Maddie (Suffolk University)

24.) “Guys who run to class”- Sydney (UMASS Boston)

25.) “Fedoras”- Molly (University of Denver)

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26.) “Do I even HAVE to say fedoras or are we just assuming that one?”- Blakeley (Hofstra)

27.) “White wife beaters or white undershirts in general” – Angela (Rhode Island College)

The fact that they call them "wife beaters" should be enough
The fact that they call them “wife beaters” should be enough

28.) “When guys wear tshirts that are too short for them” – Skylar (Suffolk University)

29.) “Leather jackets…..dunno why” – Megan (University of Vermont)

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30.) “BITING THEIR NAILS OMFG” – Nicole (Suffolk University)

31.) “Plaid shorts” – Hannah (University of South Carolina)

32.) “When they eat salad”- Catherine (Suffolk University)

33.) “Socks and shoes on the beach…like when I’m on the beach i wanna see as much skin as possible and you look like a stupid shoobie”- Chelsea (Suffolk University)

34.) “When a guy doesn’t have an iPhone” Kate (My 17 year old sister)

35.) “Puka necklaces and draw string board shorts”- Grace (University of California – Santa Barbara)

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So here you go guys! Take this information and run. Ideally most of you are only guilty of one or two of these…

More about Mackenzie

Retired scene queen living in Astoria, New York with my boyfriend Ben. Accidentally started blogging in 2011, haven't stopped since. Lover of Nutella, hater of white jeans after labor day. Graduate of Suffolk University with a degree in Sociology. During the day I work for Petrossian Caviar, the world's largest caviar supplier and buyer. I have a wonderful life, and I'm excited to share it with you. Also, I have seen every episode of Law & Order: SVU.

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  • Elis

    I agree with most of these, but some of these are a joke. Doesn’t have an iphone – seriously?? When they eat salad – so just protein then? When they run to class – in school yeah it’s not cool..elsewhere like Uni as long as it’s not a habit and they look ‘hot’ in the first place, the occasional run won’t exactly be detrimental; plus it would show their confident enough to and that they want to get on.. If I were a girl I’d pick a guy who ran to class rather than the dawdler.

    And light wash-jeans, as long as their skinny and paired with something that looks good I think their fine. Jeans shorts – well there are nice ones and bad ones… Polo-shirts – not particularly in at the moment, unless you’re playing golf..but they are on the smarter side of things so I’d agree with the author on this one.

  • Johnathan

    Seriously, you girls are impossible. After the first few I said, “Okay, I have a chance.” But no. No No no. Salads? I have no idea what to wear right now.

    • Alexis

      I’m a woman and I think this list is CRAZY! I think this chick is going to stay single acting like this, I mean shit! who would want her?

  • michael

    so youre saying men have to conform to the standards of you women and change how they talk, what they do, and how hey dress if they ever want to have a pretty girlfriend… that doesnt seem fair at all.

  • Haha fellas, I feel like there is a certain point at which you just have to say “fu** it” and eat your damn salad. Wear decent cloths, go to the gym, just try in general; It’s not hard.

  • nicole

    This is like the most superficial list EVER. Obviously, this was written by juvenile girls not by grown up women.
    No wonder women get crap from men.
    And this comes from a woman in the modeling industry.

  • dwain

    lol some girls r just so fucked in the head u think men should change to suit them yet what they dont get is some men r like me n very stubborn n wont change unless they want to i mean come on whats wrong with us ye some of us aint good looking hell i no i aint but girls like that want a man that they see as bad bys as they think they will get protection yet its the nice guy type that normally ends up knocking the bad boy type out for slapping his girlfriend …. so ye some girls need to sort there head out n notice that some shit cant be helped n maybe men like salads whats wrong with em i dont see a sign that says not for men