I recently quit my job working the front desk at the Boston Park Plaza hotel; the second biggest hotel in Boston. As someone who hates waking up before 10 am everyday, I generally worked the night shift– meaning there was rarely a concierge on duty for the second half of my shift…so I was forced to learn a bit about my city. Over my time there I met thousands of tourists, many of which asked similar questions and were surprised to find a few things to be true.
1.) Nobody calls Boston “Beantown” or “The Bean”
Unless they are a.) wicked lame, or b.) not born/raised in Massachusetts *cringes*. In my time working at the Park Plaza only one person ever asked me where to get “authentic Boston baked beans”, and I had to google it.
2.) Not everyone from Massachusetts has a Boston Accent.
I pronounce my “r”s for the most part and so does nearly everybody I know. I have a few friends from Southie and Charlestown that have accents that rival those in The Departed– but thick Boston accents are far and few between. If I had a dollar for every time a guest informed me upon meeting me that I was “definitely not from around here”, I’d be the richest girl alive.
3.) Few people in Boston even know what “wicked pissah” means
People tell me all the time but I forget every time—- BECAUSE IT IS NOT APPLICABLE IN ANY CONVERSATIONS.
4.) Most of us don’t loathe people from New York…. majority of us DGAF.
Only hard core 6th grade bros wear t-shirts that say “Yankees Suck.” Aside from game day in Fenway…. nobody cares if you’re a Boston fan or a New York Fan. Although it is a little obnoxious non-conformist to be a Yankees fan born and raised in MA.
5.) Not everyone is obsessed with Dunkin Donuts.
Most Bostonians recognize that there is better coffee out there. Dunkins is good 50% of the time and the other half it is watery and nasty. I prefer Marylous, but there are a lot of other good options.
Side note: Dunkie’s bacon egg and cheese on a croissant is the best thing in the world and I cannot deny that.
6.) Not everyone calls the liquor store the “packy”
In fact, most people don’t– just middle aged alcoholic Bostonians. Generally we go with “liquor store”… you know… like everyone else in the world.
7.) We’re not all shitty drivers.
I’m not the best driver but it has nothing to do with rage and everything to do with attention span.
8.) Not everyone spends the weekend on the cape.
Most people in Massachusetts don’t even live near the beach (I do, fortunately.) We don’t live off lobstah and chowdah (in fact I have a lot of friends that don’t like seafood) and most of us pronounce “lobster” and “chowder”… you know.. with an R and stuff.
9.) People don’t really drink at Cheers!
Only tourists! Nor do most of us give a f*ck whether or not Modern Pastry or Mike’s Pastry is better.
10.) Not everyone wears Vineyard Vines.
I’d rather wear a paper bag than a pastel floral getup. Vineyard Vines/In The Pink (Lilly Pulitzer) aren’t particularly affordable and are meant mostly for those spending memorial day weekend in Nantucket.
11.) You will never park your car in the Harvard Yard.
But it is really hard to find parking so I suggest parking in an MBTA parking lot and taking the T in.
*I grew up in Marshfield, Massachusetts just 30 minutes south of Boston and have lived in Mass my entire life*
