A year ago I would have confidently told you that I had the best life in the world. I was studying abroad in Australia and about ready to return to the U.S. Even after my homecoming, I still felt as though my life was seemingly perfect. Nearly the moment I touched ground in Boston, I fell for a guy from my past who took it upon himself to build a fairytale for me.

Tomorrow is April 1st, and I realize that I have spent the past 6 months wishing time away. I haven’t seized the day since Spring Break, but before that, probably a year. I have become increasingly fond of my apartment, probably my favorite hotspot in Boston. I even recently completed 8 seasons of Desperate Housewives.

I’m back working at the Boston Park Plaza, a place I repeatedly promise myself never to return to. The front desk is just a stop along the way for me. I go back there before transitioning into a new adventure. But what is the next step? I’m less sure than ever at this time.

I graduate in about a month and a half, but to the surprise of absolutely nobody, have put myself in the position where I must take two summer classes to get my diploma. Its fine, I should probably learn Spanish anyways, but I wish that I had set myself up for graduating on time. My B.

So whats NEXT?? I have a few options, but nothing I’m ready to commit to. I’ve got someone pulling me in the direction of NYC, for something that could potentially lead to some serious success in the fashion industry. On the other hand, I want to be somewhere where I can count on the sun to warm my skin. I have very few connections out in California, but I’ve always felt thats where I belong. Do I go where the job opportunities are, or where the lifestyle appeals?

But what about Australia? If I know I can be happy somewhere, why wouldn’t I go back there? Would it make more sense for me to work there, or somewhere else abroad? Would it be senseless to leave my family, or the best decision of my life?

I’m completely unsure of what I want my legacy to be, and I know I need time to assess it. I’ve found myself excelling in classes that typically wouldn’t interest me; which is completely confusing as a senior in college. I realize you never stop learning, but I would at least like some indication of what career I should choose. Will I use my degree, or am I going to allot half my salary towards paying off loans for the rest of my life in vain?

Other option: Nicole and I could transfer to a hotel in Hawaii and we’ll never have to be cold again.

Cheers to uncertainty.