‘Tis the season to be jolly…and maybe a bit triggered. While there is the cute, magical energy of the holidays, how could we forget about the overall exhausting af situations it brings too? During this time, stress can arise surrounding family, money, expectations, food etc. So, how can we find balance while dreading what our family members will say? Or when we see people posting the gifts they received or when we start comparing ourselves to where others think we should be in our lives? It can seem damn near impossible to stay grounded, but it doesn’t have to be. Let’s dive into a few easily accessible ways to help preserve your mental health during the most “wonderful” time of the year.

1. Set Your Boundaries

Establishing boundaries is not selfish. Boundaries allow us to stay connected with ourselves and decide what we allow into our lives. This time always makes me fall back into people-pleasing patterns, especially with not wanting to upset any family members. Setting clear boundaries is how you put your wellbeing first, which is something we’ve deemed to be self-centered. Let me say this LOUD and CLEAR: There is nothing wrong with saying “no” to anything you know will leave you feeling drained. Give yourself permission to excuse yourself from the table at any moment and take time for yourself to recenter and recharge. You can rewrite the narrative of the holidays and make this season what you want it to be. Where do you need to set a boundary in your life in order to stay grounded?

2. Put Your Pen to Paper

Check in with yourself as much as possible through the power of pen to paper. Journaling is the best way to lovingly peel off the mask that we wear to the public and, sometimes, to ourselves. Wherever you are, find a pen and blank paper (honestly-your iPhone notes work too.) Start with just writing anything that comes to mind about how you’re feeling in the present moment. If you’re stuck, start with the question of, “What makes me feel grounded?” Look at what you jot down and allow yourself to do more of whatever keeps you aligned. Close your eyes and imagine your heartbeat slowing down to a normal pace, bringing you back to a balanced state. How do you feel? Jot it down. Who or what makes you feel triggered? Jot it down. What is one thing you can do whenever you experience a stressful situation? Write down one of those moments where you feel grounded. Keep your words close to you so that you can revisit them whenever you need to.

I’ve kept my journals since the age of 10 and to be able to look back on what I was experiencing and how I’ve grown is so important to me. I believe in this method so much that myself and my dear friend, Carina Musolino, created a monthly subscription service of guided journals to help improve your mental health. If any of the Mack in Style readers are interested, you can get a discount using the code: HOLIDAY10 at www.bloomsjournal.com

3. Find Your Community

The facade that every family is a smiley Hallmark situation during this time can greatly affect one’s wellbeing. While spending too much time on Twitter the other day, I saw some tweets being incredibly negative and naive about people who have Friendsgivings. And to that I say, what a privilege it must be to assume that everyone has family or is in a healthy family situation! If you find yourself needing assistance during the holidays, give yourself permission to ask for help. There are people that want to help you so find that community whether it’s family members or not. You do not have to be around people who will make you feel bad about yourself or have you comparing your path to theirs. That type of community is incredibly unhealthy and can leave a more negative impact on your thoughts than you know. You deserve to be surrounded by those who truly uplift you. Give yourself the freedom to choose the company you’re around and see how this season can shift for you.

4. Just Keep Breathin’, Literally

This seems counterintuitive, but it’s something we forget about every second of every day. If you can, find an empty room, a car, a bathroom, go outside, wherever! Close your eyes, place one hand on your heart and one hand on your belly. Begin to inhale through the nose for the count of 4, hold for 5, audibly exhale for 7. Repeat until you feel a little more centered. And if you can’t get away from the table or people around you, slowly inhale for the count of 4, hold for 4, and exhale for 4. Even if there is stimulation all around you, doing this will help bring you back to your breath and clear your mind.

A few friendly reminders you can repeat when shit gets tough:

I am safe to express my truth.

I don’t have to pretend like I’m the person they think I should be.

I am making my wellbeing my first priority.

Pleeeease slide into my DMs on IG and let me know if you use any of these methods! I’ll be right there with you. Happy Holidays, loves!
Discount code: HOLIDAY10 at www.bloomsjournal.com IG: @mybloomsjournal